Once upon a time, there was a wise old Crab. He spent his days on the banks of a lake full of young fish, swimming and living their life as they choose. He considered these fish as his children and the fish respected him greatly. As the days went by, slowly their little lake began to dry out due to the heat of the sun. The days went by and slowly but surely, the lake became drier and drier.
Then one day, he noticed a Crane approaching the fish. As a parent figure, he immediately stood on his guard to see what the Crane had to say to his little fish. The Crane offered to take the fish to a nearby lake which had much more water and nutrients for the fish to swim in. The Crab became weary of the idea of the Crane carrying his dear fish to the lake and volunteered as tribute to make sure the Crane was not lying.
Abiding by this command, the Crane told the Crab to jump into his beak so he could carry him across the to another lake. The Crab outsmarted the Crane and said his claws wouldn't fit in his mouth, so he would hold onto the Cranes neck. The Crane rashly agreed. As they started their journey to the other lake, the Crab quickly understood the Crane's intentions when the Crane took the wrong turn.
"Stupid crab," the Crane said, "Why would I ever help you. I will eat you first and then all your dear fish."
To this, the crab replied, "Stupid Crane, I was aware of your intentions. Do you not notice where my claws are? If you dare to try to eat me, I will snip your neck right off."
The Crane knew he had been a fool, "Dear crab, I am so sorry" he spoke, " I will put surely put you in the lake."
However, it was too late and the Crab did not belive the Crane had changed his mind so fast. Holding tightly, the Crab nipped the Cranes neck.
As soon as the Crab nipped the Crane's head off, it started to pour down rain. It took the Crab two days to slowly go back to his lake with all the fish, but once he reached there, he was greeted with much fanfare and a lake full of water. The crab in the fish lived happily ever after, with no Crane ever approaching them again.
Authors note: This story is a rewrite of The Cunning Crane and the Crab by W. H. D. Rouse. I have told the story from the point of view of the crab and have made a more positive ending for the fish.
Bibliography: The Cunning Crane and the Crab by W. H. D. Rouse in the online stories of Jatakas
Then one day, he noticed a Crane approaching the fish. As a parent figure, he immediately stood on his guard to see what the Crane had to say to his little fish. The Crane offered to take the fish to a nearby lake which had much more water and nutrients for the fish to swim in. The Crab became weary of the idea of the Crane carrying his dear fish to the lake and volunteered as tribute to make sure the Crane was not lying.
Abiding by this command, the Crane told the Crab to jump into his beak so he could carry him across the to another lake. The Crab outsmarted the Crane and said his claws wouldn't fit in his mouth, so he would hold onto the Cranes neck. The Crane rashly agreed. As they started their journey to the other lake, the Crab quickly understood the Crane's intentions when the Crane took the wrong turn.
(Picture of a Crane sitting on the edge of a lake- image provided by Flickr)
"Stupid crab," the Crane said, "Why would I ever help you. I will eat you first and then all your dear fish."
The Crane knew he had been a fool, "Dear crab, I am so sorry" he spoke, " I will put surely put you in the lake."
However, it was too late and the Crab did not belive the Crane had changed his mind so fast. Holding tightly, the Crab nipped the Cranes neck.
As soon as the Crab nipped the Crane's head off, it started to pour down rain. It took the Crab two days to slowly go back to his lake with all the fish, but once he reached there, he was greeted with much fanfare and a lake full of water. The crab in the fish lived happily ever after, with no Crane ever approaching them again.
Authors note: This story is a rewrite of The Cunning Crane and the Crab by W. H. D. Rouse. I have told the story from the point of view of the crab and have made a more positive ending for the fish.
Bibliography: The Cunning Crane and the Crab by W. H. D. Rouse in the online stories of Jatakas
Hey Amandeep!
ReplyDeleteI like how you made a subtle change to the story that was also unique because the ending changed. However, I think that in your next story, you should try and change something a little more drastically, just to throw off your readers and make it fun! Maybe you can also switch the roles like the crab becomes the antagonist and the crane becomes the protagonist. I don't know how that story would play out exactly... but that would be funny!
Hello Amandeep! I'm going to be trying the TAG feedback method with your story. Here's the first part...
ReplyDeleteTELL: I liked how you retold the story but still kept the tone and writing style similar to that of the original story. This story is a fairly typical fable, but I think you retold it in a way that freshens it up while still keeping the original spirit intact. I also liked how the ending was different and how the crane was outsmarted in this version. Your writing style is nice, as well; you manage to be descriptive but still stay succinct, which is a characteristic of many fables.
ASK: Why did you decide to switch the ending of the story?
GIVE: The only recommendation/ suggestion I have is that there are two typos in the last sentence.
Overall I think you did a good job with this retelling and I look forward to reading more of your writing for this class!